You Are My Sunshine, My Only Sunshine
by JuwahBel
Summary: Bobby's being stalked by someone who keeps killing the women he gets close to. Meanwhile, a past love re-enters his life. Chapter 13 is up!
1. Wake Up Call

_**Author's Note: Hey everybody! I just wanted to start another case file type thing since I'm not going anywhere with Psycho Puppy anytime soon. I decided to pretend that Blind Spot or Siren Call didn't happen so that there won't be too many traumas happening to our dearest B/A. So, just imagine that season 6 doesn't existno rhyme intended there, folks!. I have to stop now so I don't reveal anything to you! Thanks. Please review. I want to know what people think will happen. P.S. Sorry so short. I did it for suspense. **_

_Ring...Ring..._

The sound of the ringing telephone pierced the dark, cold air. A grunt sounded in reply as Robert Goren turned over underneath the sheets. He reluctantly opened his eyes and looked at the digital alarm clock face.

_Ring...Ring..._

3:15 AM. "Who the..." Bobby thought as he attempted to reach for the phone on his bedside table. His fingers barely touched the base for the cordless. He scooted over and grabbed the phone. His eyes wandered to the caller idea screen. "Unknown Caller" flashed rhythmically on the light up display.

_Ring...Ring..._

Bobby pressed the 'Talk' button.

"Hello?" His voice was barely audible and rough.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine." The voice on the other end was that of a woman's. She was singing softly, and she had a tint of laughter to her voice. She spaced out her words, drawing them out.

"Who is this?" Bobby was sitting up now. His voice was getting stronger, building up the usual menace that laced his speech.

"You make me happy when skies are gray." The voice continued on, taunting Bobby.

"Who is this!" He yelled into the phone. "Is this your idea of some sick joke? Calling me at 3 in the morning!?"

"You never know, dear, how much I love you." The voice continued on, unfaltering. "Please don't take my sunshine away." A soft giggle sounded from the other line and then a click and then the dial tone.

Bobby hung up and slammed the phone onto the charger. Something about that voice haunted him.

_It was just a couple of teenagers prank calling people. Happens all of the time._ He thought, trying to reassure himself. But no matter how much he tried to think that it was all a joke, something inside of him knew something was wrong, something at the bottom of his gut told him this wasn't a joke.


	2. Cleanliness Counts After Death

Author's note: Sorry if its horrible. I just wanted to get something up so I could keep my creative juices flowing. Its in the middle of the night now, so I may wake up tomorrow and realize this chapter is pure and utter crap. So, be warned! Enjoy! 

"She was found like this. The crew hasn't touched anything."

Bobby nodded at the police officer that guided him through the small, cottage-style house.

Robert Goren was led into a bright pink bedroom that was littered with the usual feminine things. There were pillows neatly stacked at the head of the bed, hair brushes and makeup on the vanity, even some lingerie laid out on a chair near the window overlooking the park across the street. The only thing that was out of place in the girly room was the corpse of a young brunette on the bed.

The body was in the center of the bed, legs straight out, her hair sprawled out in a halo around her head, arms crossed with the fingers clasping a large sunflower at her chest.

Bobby entered the room, took in his surroundings, and then walked to the neatly made bed. He put his gloves on and handed his portfolio to an officer.

"Hold on to that," The detective said. The policeman nodded and exited the room.

Robert leaned forward and began to examine the body. _Doesn't even seem like the girl's dead. Hmmmm..._ Bobby thought as he turned the girls head slightly to the right.

"I see a wound, but no blood. Looks like she was hit, or stabbed, with something and then cleaned up." Bobby stooped down and smelled the girl's hair. "Uh, I smell strawberry shampoo. Look for strawberry shampoo here. Maybe we can pull some prints from the bottle." Two cops left at the motion of Bobby's hand.

"No bruises, either. No sign of a struggle..." Bobby touched the girl's arm. He glanced at his hand and noticed the tan smudge on it. "Scratch that." He leaned in closer and smelled the girl's arm. "The killer put makeup on her. Foundation, most likely." He began to rub a spot on her arm. A dark purple mark appeared, providing proof for his statement.

Bobby stepped back. And took his gloves off.

"Make a note to the ME to make sure all of the makeup is off, just so we know what really happened." He left the room and went to the front, where the first responder stood looking over some papers.

"Ah! Detective! How pleasant to see you again." The kind looking man turned and shook Robert's hand. "Where's your partner? Usually you're glued to each other."

"She's in Florida. I guess she finally got tired of me." Bobby laughed, but he secretly wished what he said wasn't true. "So, give me what ever information you have, Greg."

"Her name is Linzy Carmello. She's 23. She's moved in here about 3 months ago, according to the neighbors. That's pretty much all I could get from them. The only thing that they had to say other than that was she was a nice girl." Greg, the cop, handed a manilla folder over to the towering man beside him.

"Aren't they all." Bobby said as he began flipping through the papers in the folder. The folder contained deeds, bills, and some legal documents.

Bobby glanced up and saw the officer with his portfolio walking by. "Hey! Hey, yea. I can take that back. Thanks."

He grabbed his leather portfolio and tucked the folder inside of it. "If you don't mind..." Greg nodded at Bobby. "Thanks." Bobby shook Greg's hand again, and then made his way out to the car.

Just then his cell phone began to ring. "Eames" was on the front display.

_Sunflower. No blood. Sunflower. Arms crossed across the chest. Hands holding a sunflower. _

Robert Goren leaned back and put his hands behind his head. He closed his eyes and saw the girl in front of him again. He saw her chestnut brown hair gracefully surrounding her face, her delicate fingers wrapped around the stem of the flower.

According to her report, she was a student at a nearby college who had recently moved up from a small town in southern Georgia, her full name was Linzy Marie Carmello and her birthdate was December 12, 1983.

Pictures were scattered across the metal table in an interrogation room. Sitting at his desk was too stressful for Bobby. There was too much noise. Right now he needed to be alone where it was quiet, where he could actually hear himself think.

_No signs of struggle in the house. Makeup. Sunflower. Strawberry shampoo. _

The ME concluded that she died from a stab wound at the back of her head. The wound had been washed out with alcohol, the girl had been scrubbed down, her hair washed, and then she was clothed. The bruises had been given to the body while she was being cleaned, post-mortem. The ME even said it was possible that the killer gave the corpse a manicure.

There were no prints on the shampoo bottle, but the ME said that the shampoo used on the girl was not the same that was in her bathroom. Prints had also been lifted off of door handles and other objects in the home, but the only finger prints that had been found where that of the victim.

It was yesterday when Bobby had taken the case and he still hadn't gotten anywhere. Usually by now there were a few leads, even some evidence against a suspect. But there was barely any kind of evidence there. The only thing he had was a specific brand of strawberry shampoo, and a strange obsession with perfection. Too bad you couldn't convict someone who smelled like strawberries with a type A personality with murder.

Bobby leaned forward and began to message his temples. He had been thinking about this case ever since he first walked into that bedroom yesterday. Something just seemed so familiar about it. But he couldn't figure out why he felt that way. All this thinking was beginning to give him a headache. The sleep deprivation wasn't helping his throbbing head either. He hadn't slept at all since the phone call he had received a couple of nights ago where the person on the other end of the line was singing that strange tune that his mother had sang to him when he was a child.

The click of the doorknob turning caused Bobby to look up to the door. The captain swung the door open and looked at Goren.

"Something came for you." The curly haired man gave Bobby a strange look. "Its on your desk."

The captain left the doorway.

Bobby gathered his papers and stuck them in his portfolio. He took a deep breath and then left the room himself, closing the door quietly before he made his way to his desk.

His stride came to a halt as soon as he saw the sunflower on top of his desk with a note tied to it with brown string. The detective picked up the small piece of paper that was on the end of the string. Typed on the paper were the words "To my sunshine...".


	3. Bonus Chapter: The Phone Call

**Author's Note: Hello! It is late at night AGAIN! I had the sudden urge to write this out for those who asked what happened. Originally there was a lot more dialogue, but it was horrible. So, I tried adding in some other stuff, you know, like emotions, thoughts, etc. I don't know if it worked out or not. You'll have to let me know. In the main story, i wanted to include this, but it didn't really work out. Consider this a bonus type thing. I hope you enjoy! **

**P.S. Please tell me if it is okay or not. Positive feedback always inspires me to continue on with stories. **

**P.P.S. This takes place where the "" are. (just incase you didn't know where it happened.)**

_Bobby pressed the talk button. "Hello?" _

_"Hey, Goren. I just wanted to make sure you were alright. When we last talked, you seemed sort of, I don't know, down. Just tell me every thing's okay so I can stop worrying about you." Concern tainted Alex Eames's voice. Bobby could see the look on her face even though she was hundreds of miles away. He knew her brows were furrowed, her lips pursed, he could even tell that she was sitting with her fingers lightly touching her forehead. _

_"I'm fine, Alex." Was all he could say. He tried to not let the words 'Alex, I want you to come home, because I'm not myself without you,' come out of his mouth. "I just haven't been sleeping much. But, I'm fine."_

_"Are you sure? I mean, you sound like there's something else-"_

_"Alex, stop. I'm fine. Don't worry about me. Just go back to Mickey Mouse. I'll see you in a couple of days." He was tempted to hang up the phone then so he wouldn't have to think about Alex, but something about her voice calmed him down. He wanted to hang up on her, but then again he didn't want to. Something inside of him wanted to get over her so he wouldn't have to feel this way when she wasn't around, something inside of him wanted to have her in his arms forever so that she would never leave and she would never make him feel like this again. _

_"Um. Actually, plans have sort of changed. It turns out I won't be able to come home for about another 5 days. My sister won this raffle thing and got us this cruise for this weekend. Its just going to be her and me. We're letting some friends of ours take the kids." Alex's voice lifted and she began to sound like a teenager. He couldn't remember the last time she had been so excited about spending time with family. _

_"I hope you two have fun-"_

_"Oh we will! We're going to have massages and pedicures. I especially can't wait to whistle at the hot pool boys in the Speedos..." Bobby snorted and a laugh sounded from the other end of the phone. He could tell that she was joking about the boys in Speedos part. She always said stuff like that to him. _

_"Well, I'm glad. You deserve a break from this hell hole." Bobby looked around him, and then looked down at his free hand._

_Lines raced across his palm, intertwining and intersecting, dancing the dance of his life. Somewhere, a line was put there because of Alex. Which ever line it was that was Alex's would always stay with him, just like she would. _

_"Bobby, I really want you to promise me that you'll get some sleep. Heck, take a couple of days off. I know you have a few saved up. You should go do something for yourself." Alex wasn't lying. He did have a couple of days that he could take. 20 actually. He had accumulated them over the past few years in hopes of cashing them in for the big check that he would receive if he didn't take them. But, he couldn't. Now that he was so deep into this case, he couldn't just drop it. _

_"I wish I could. There's been this case...one that is so bizarre. Be thankful you don't have to worry about it." Bobby laughed. _

_"Oh, really. Please explain. I'm interested. Could this be the only case too bizarre for the great Robert Goren?" _

_"Very funny, Eames." Bobby shifted himself in the driver's seat of his SUV and looked out of his window at the house where officers continuously filed in and out of the door. _

_"A girl was killed, obviously. She was a girl, about 23. She was killed in her home, I'm guessing. You should have seen her. She was carefully laid out on the bed, her hair arranged around her face, her hands crossed and holding a sunflower. There were no signs of struggle, no blood. The killer stabbed her in the back of the head and then scrubbed her down with strawberry shampoo. The killer even put makeup on the bruises that he gave her post-mortem! I...I just don't understand why someone would do that to a dead body. I don't know why someone would want to make her seem perfect, better than life. Maybe its some obsession with perfection, an inward want to be some super-ideal human. I don't know. Maybe the perp just wanted a life size Barbie doll," Goren put his free hand on the steering wheel and began drumming his thumb against the hard leather of the steering device. _

_"Wow. Seems like a toughie...Maybe the killer thought the girl was perfect, and just wanted to bring it to the attention of others. Or maybe there's personal significance to the killer. Perhaps a past memory." Eames's voice was now hard with thought. _

_'Great! Now I pulled her into it. She"s not going to be able to enjoy her vacation now...' Robert thought. The last thing he wanted was to screw up Alex's vacation from hundreds of miles away. _

_"Ah, don't worry about it, Alex. Go back to Walt and your nephew. And..." Bobby stopped. _

_"And what, Bobby?" _

_"And, make sure you come home safely. I...I miss you." It was out. Out in the open and Bobby couldn't help but breathe a silent sigh of relief now that it was off of his chest. _

_Silence on the other end made Bobby nervous. Sure, it was out there, but how would it be received? Would she laugh at him? Tell him he was out of line? Bobby immediately regretted letting those words come out. But there was nothing he could do now. _

_"I miss you too, Bobby. Call me later, okay?" Softness emanated from her voice. _

_"Okay." He said quietly. "Talk to you later, Alex." _

_"Goodbye, Bobby." _


	4. My BabyFaced Boy Pt 1

**(Author's Note: Yay! 3rd chapter's up! We should celebrate because this is my 2nd longest story yet. I left a little cliffhanger at the end, but I'm off to write the 4th chapter now, so you shouldn't have to wait long for the rest. Enjoy, my pets!)**

"Don't beat yourself up over this too much, Goren. Its just another case." Mike logan perched himself casually on the desk of the absent detective, Alex Eames. He looked across that the large framed man who's head was now on his desk.

"Mike, this just isn't another case." His voice was muffled, but Goren's message was sent across none the less. Goren pounded his fist into the wood desktop and then lifted his head up. "The church fire case was 'just another case', the missing wife case was 'just another case'. This one isn't. This one...this is one is different." Bobby placed his hands on his eyes and propped his elbows on top of his desk.

"How so?" Mike leaned forward, staring intently at the shaking head of his MCS co-worker.

Bobby replied by opening his desk drawer and pulling out a sunflower. He threw the flower at Mike.

"'To my sunshine...'. Hmmm...looks like you have a secret admirer. So, who's sunshine are you?" Mike smirked as he continued to examine to flower and the note attached to it.

Goren forced a sarcastic smile and then threw the case file to Eames's desk. Logan picked it up and began sorting through the pictures of the victim.

"Ah...I see now." Mike continued to flip through the file.

"Logan...If I told you something...something no one else knows...would you say anything about it to anyone else?" Goren began to rub his temples. After he had found the flower, a migraine had begun to take over. He could feel his pulse in the back of his head, the irregular rhythm was so loud to the point where he had to strain to hear the man that was merely 3 feet away.

"Yeah, of course." Detective Logan set down the manilla folder and leaned forward attentively. He began to study the face of Robert Goren. He was baby faced, yet he looked old. Crows feet snaked out from the corners of his drooping eyelids, creases decorated his forehead, and gray hair was sprouting from his temples. Bobby's mouth seemed lower in the corners, and a scruffy graphite colored beard was sprawled across his face. Mike had noticed strange changes in Goren ever since Eames left for Florida about a week before. Was Goren that dependent on his partner? Or was there something else going on behind the rough, harsh exterior of the man in front of him?

"The other night...I got a call. It was about 3 in the morning. I answered and the person on the other line began singing "You Are My Sunshine". The person was obviously a woman, but that's all I know. She was practically whispering, so I didn't get a good listen to her voice. At first, I thought it was just a prank, but then I saw the victim," Bobby gesticulated towards the folder on the desk opposite of his, and then to the flower Mike was holding. "Then, I got that flower."

"So, you think the perp's after you?" Logan looked down at the flower and began to finger the connected note.

"I don't know. Maybe-"

"You don't think its Nicole Wallace, do you?" Logan looked at Robert, who was staring off into the oblivion of his blank computer screen.


	5. My BabyFaced Boy Pt 2

_You don't think its Nicole Wallace, do you?" Logan looked at Robert, who was staring off into the oblivion of his blank computer screen._

"No. If she did this, she'd want herself known. She'd want me to know it was her. Its someone else, I'm almost positive." Bobby leaned back in his chair and put his hands on his face. _But who? _He asked himself.

"Okay, well, I have to make a trip to the ADA's office. I hope I don't come back to find you here worrying about it, because if I do I'll be forced to take action." Mike hopped off of the desk and began to walk away.

"Oh yeah? Like what?" Bobby called after him. "What are you going to do? Beat me up?"

Logan turned around. "No. I was thinking more along the lines of going bar hopping, getting you drunk, and finding you a woman." Mike winked and then turned and left.

"Ever partied like this before?" Mike Logan motioned towards the night life in the street around them.

Bobby stared out of the passenger window at the glowing, shiny faces of the beautiful New York City youth. He longed to be that young again, to be that free. He wished he could go out and get smashed with the superficial kids that took life as it came and who remained ignorant to the world around them.

A massive crowd of people came into sight ahead of Mike's car.

"Aww crap." Mike slowed down as he reached the edge of the swarm. People yelled, middle fingers found their way into the air, and cups of beer were thrown on the car in response to the blaring of the car's horn.

People began to slowly move around the car. A girl on the curb near Bobby's window keeled over and began to puke up all of her stomach contents. A guy walked by and pushed her over into her own vomit, then continued on to his friends where he turned, pointed, and laughed at the crying girl on the ground. Near this spectacle, a fight was beginning to break out amongst drunken men. A punch was thrown and then several guys jumped onto one male and began to beat the life out of him.

Bobby looked away. No matter how much he wanted to be one of them, he was grateful for the barrier that protected him from their harsh world of clubs, violence, alcohol and drugs.

"Are you alright, Goren?" Mike looked over at his coworker, who was hunched down in his seat, examining his hands.

"Um...sure." Bobby tried the best he could to sound convincingly sure of his answer, but he knew he wasn't. He knew that Mike could see through this feeble disguise of stability and control.

"Don't lie to me, Goren. You know how I hate it when people lie to me." Sure enough, Logan had called Bobby on his bluff. Goren brought his hands up to his forehead and pinched the bridge of his nose. Masking his depression and worry was unhealthy and was starting to give him a headache.

"Yeah. I'm-"

"I've noticed that you've been a bit depressed lately. Is it because of the case? Family? Or is it because Alex is gone?" Mike could tell that something he had said had hit a nerve because Bobby had shifted in his seat as soon as Mike had mentioned Alex.

_He feels for her..._Logan thought as he tore his eyes away from the man in the passenger seat.

No answer sounded from Bobby, so Mike let it go. What ever it was, Bobby would have to open up sooner or later, or else it would drive him crazy.

"Here we are!" Mike drove the car into an open parking space.

They were in a large parking lot. At the north side of the lot sat a house-looking building where hundreds of people gathered. They were everywhere, hanging out of windows, covering the balcony, the porch, the concrete around the place. A large sign hung off of the porch that read "O'Malley's Tavern and Grill".

Despite the large amount of people in the tavern, the parking lot was virtually empty. Mike had decided to park about 100 spaces from the nearest car, about 500 yards from the front door.

"Come on, Bobby-boy. Let's go have some fun!" He said as he pulled the key out of the ignition and stepped out into the chilly night.

Logan made his way across the vast emptiness of the parking lot, leaving Robert Goren alone in the car.

_Everything is so screwed up. I can't even go out with a friend anymore without feeling like I can't do anything without her. And now, on top of all of this, I have to worry about a killer who's leaving me flowers and calling me at 3 in the morning. Agh! What is going on with me..._Bobby let his head lean against the window. He took a deep breath and exhaled, watching the window fog up and then clear again.

_I have to do something about this. If I don't I'll never get over her. _Bobby took another deep breath, closed his eyes, and then found his way out of the car and into the December night.

"Sorry! Excuse m-sorry!" Robert Goren weaved through the mass of people inside of the tavern. People were sitting on the banisters of the staircase, sitting on tables, there was even a woman sitting on the mantel above the large fire place.

"A hah! Goren! Glad to see you could make it, my friend!" Logan came up behind Bobby and put his hand on Robert's shoulder. "I'd like you to meet Martha and Cindy." Logan motioned towards two twin blonds that had followed Logan around Bobby.

The twins looked like they were in their late 30's. They wore leather busteirs and leather pants. They were good looking, not Goren's type though.

"Oooo! Looks like a working man." Martha, the twin on the right said.

"Looks like a **hard** working man." Cindy put her hand on Bobby's shoulder, then let it slowly trail down his arm. They both giggled.

"Come now, ladies. Let's be nice to Bobby. He's not used to this type of place, so let's show him around." Mike put his hand on Bobby's back once more and smiled that Cheshire cat smile.

"Ooo! I want to do it!" Cindy put her arm around Bobby's and began to pull him in the direction of the bar.

Bobby looked at Mike, who only waved and smiled as Martha whispered in his ear.

_I'm going to kill him..._Bobby thought as he was lead away from his friend.

"You look like a whiskey type of man...right?" Said Cindy as she brought him up to the bar. The bartender had approached the two, resting his hands on the bar top. Bobby looked from the bearded bartender, to the small, blond woman who was now showing off her clevage.

_Better watch what you do before you regret it, _He thought as he glanced at the woman's chest.

"Um, just a beer, thanks." Bobby nodded at the bartend, then looked to the woman.

"So what brings you down here? You don't look like the type that usually hangs out with our crowd." Cindy fingered the lapel of Bobby's suit jacket. Logan and Goren had left right after work to make it here, so Bobby hadn't had any time to change into something more...casual.

"Logan...uh...Mike, brought me down here. He said that that he knew a great bar where I could 'loosen up'. So, here we are." Cindy pushed Bobby's beer towards him as the barkeep set it down on the bartop.

"Oh, we can loosen you up, alright." Cindy smiled as she took a long swig from her beer bottle.

_Beep beep beep beep beep_...

Bobby groaned as he rolled over and hit the 'snooze' button on his digital alarm clock. Bobby opened his eyes and was met with the blinding light of the early morning sun, as well as a piercing headache. Bobby closed his eyes and dropped his head into his down feather pillow.

What did he do with Cindy last night? How much had he had to drink? All he could remember of the night before was the front of the tavern and the car ride there.

"God." He said aloud as he slowly lifted himself out of the tangle of sheets and onto the side of the bed.

Bobby looked down at his red and orange boxers. The pattern on them blurred and shifted. "God!" Bobby stood up, ran to the bathroom and began to vomit into his toilet.

After he was finished puking up his stomach contents, he made his way to his telephone and dialed the number for the Captain.

"Captain, its Goren. I can't come in today. Yeah. I'm sick. Okay. See you tomorrow."

((Author's Note: I sort of drew a blank at the end, I just can't wait to get to the next chapter, so that's why Bobby got a hang over. See you next chapter!))


	6. A Beautiful Dream

**Author's Note: I just wanted to bring this fic back. Its definitely my favorite one. The dream sequence will be explained later, no worries. Tell me if you like it!**

Bobby had spent the entire day throwing up and regretting the previous night. By 6 pm, he had found his way to his couch, a migraine thumping at his temples.

"Why...?" He muttered, as he laid back, his head on the arm rest and his feet and arms falling onto the floor. He had to get a new couch. You couldn't even call what he was laying on a couch. It was more like a love seat. Why he bought it, he didn't know. What's the point in having a couch if you can't fit in it?

"Oh, god!" He screamed. Soon he lost consciousness and drifted into sleep.....

* * *

_"Good morning, sunshine!" Bobby rolled over on the plush bed. The woman's voice was coming from just next to him. He slowly opened his eyes, then immediately shut them when he was blinded by the whiteness of the room around him. _

_Bobby grunted then rolled over onto his back. His hand rested on his chest, and he realized he was completely naked under the sheets. He raised his head and opened his eyes _. _He was met with a bleach white room filled with sunshine, and a gorgeous redhead in the bed with him. _

_She was leaning on on right arm, looking over at him. She smiled when he looked at her, and he couldn't help but smile back. Her hand found its way into his hair, her fingers intwined in his curls. _

_"Sleep well?" Her voice was soft, luscious. Her long red curls snaked across her bare back and the white pillows around her. He reached his hand up and placed it on the side of her ivory face. She smiled and nestled into his hand. "I'll take that as a yes..."_

_She came closer to him and leaned over him. Their lips met and the two were lost in a world of crimson curls. She broke the contact and looked into his brown eyes as he looked into her blue ones. _

_"Shall we have breakfast, my husband?"_


	7. 7 Missed Calls

**Author's Note: The girl in the dream is someone I've taken the liberty to insert into the story. She'll be appearing in another story coming soon, which will explain her presence in the dream. Tell me how you like it!**

Bobby woke up with a start. The room was lit with pre-dawn light. Everything in the room was a dull blue.

His body was soaked with sweat and he was shivering, his boxers wet with his perspiration. He brought his hand up to his lips, brushing them with his fingertips. He could still feel the pressure of her lips on his, even though she hadn't even been here with him. He yearned for her, that woman...

Bobby shook his head. Remnants of the migraine remained, but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle. He had been to work numerous times with a hangover, so you could say he knew what he was doing.

Goren stood and stretched his arms over his head. He looked at his constantly beeping cell phone on his coffee table. He picked the phone up and looked at the display. "7 missed calls" flashed on the screen.

"Great, I bet half are from Captain..."

He was wrong, they were all from Eames.

Bobby pressed the voicemail button and yawned once more.

"7 new voice messages.

1st from .....Alex Eames...

'Hey, Bobby. I told you to call me back, and you didn't. I'm just making sure that you haven't buried yourself in this case. You really need to take a break! If you were wondering, the cruise is great. We're in the Bahamas now. Give me a call!'

Next from...Alex Eames

'Hey! Its me. I still haven't heard from you. It'd be great if you'd give me a call, or a text, or an e-mail, or something. I'm really worried about you! Bye...' "

Each of his 7 messages were from Alex. By the last message, her voice was tinged with panic. She hadn't heard from him in 36 hours and she was already considering calling in a missing persons report.

Bobby set the phone down, not wanting to talk to her just yet. The dream he had just awaken from filled his mind. He wouldn't be able to hold a decent conversation with just having dreamt that.

Bobby walked through his barely lit apartment to the kitchen. He turned on the light and grabbed the box of raisin bran cereal, something his mom always fed him when he was a kid. As he poured himself a bowl, he heard his cell phone ring.

"Great, Eames again. Won't she just let up?" By now Eames's badgering had begun to annoy him. He was a grown man capable of taking care of himself. Sure, he missed her and he wasn't the same in her absence, but what would happen to him? Would he be kidnapped? No. Anyone thinking of kidnapping someone his size was out of their mind. Would he be murdered? Probably not. Unbeknownst to a lot of people, he had hand-to-hand combat training during his time in the military, which would be enough protection.

Bobby sighed, then slowly made his way to his cell phone. Instead of seeing "Alex Eames" on the cover display, he saw "Unknown Number". Perhaps this was the idiot who had called him at 3 in the morning. If it was, he was going to demand for an explanation. As much as he wanted it to be a drunk dialing incident, or perhaps a wrong number, something in his gut told him that that call had been very important to him in some way.

Bobby opened his phone, placed his finger on the talk button, breathed in, breathed out, then pressed the talk button.

"Hello?"


	8. Too many calls, not enough clothes

**Author's Note: I'm so excited about this fic. I love Bobby playing between Eames and the mysterious red head in his dream. Who really holds his heart?**

There was laughing on the other end.

"I don't know who you are, or what you think you're doing, but this joke is not funny!" Bobby began shouting into the phone. His face burned with anger.

The laughing continued.

"Is this some sort of sick joke? Are you just some loser high school kid looking for some old man to play pranks on? If you call me one more time…oh…you don't want to know what kind of Hell will be sent your way!" His anger escaped from his grasp. He usually wouldn't be this aggressive, but there was something about this person calling him that just agitated him, plus, this was on top of his annoyance with Eames.

"Oh, Bobby. You should calm down. Such a temper doesn't become you…." The voice was just a whisper, too soft for him to be able to identify the voice. "You looked so peaceful while you slept…."

Bobby whipped around, looking for someone who might be hiding in his apartment. He stomped off to all corners of the apartment, searching from top to bottom.

"Silly, silly, boy...." The voice cooed. Bobby returned to his kitchen, teeth clenched. He eyed his windows. All were closed and covered except for the small window above his sink, one that gave a perfect view of his couch. He always kept this window uncovered because it faced a large alley where few dared to venture. Every once in a while, a vagabond would call it home, but other than that it was desolate.

Bobby rushed to the window and looked out.

"I don't know who, or where you are, but…." Goren fumed.

"But, what, baby boy? Are you going to come find me? Come take care of me?" The words were tinged with mocking tones. "What is the big bad detective going to do now?" The voice erupted in laughter once again. "Don't worry, there'll be sunshine….eventually." There was one last cackle, then the phone went dead.

Bobby turned from the window, put his right hand on top of his head, then threw the cell phone with his left. The phone ricocheted of the couch and into a large basket of newspapers. He turned, both hands on his head, to that small window once again. How that person could see him, he didn't know. The only people who would be able to see him from that angle, would have to be suspended on the window-less wall opposite of Bobby's apartment, or they installed a camera inside of his home somehow.

He had to get out of here, but he didn't know what to do. He had no parents left, his brother was on the streets, and here he was, unsafe in his own home.

He sighed deeply, then grabbed the phone out of its landing place. Goren fell to the couch and flipped open his cell then began dialing.

"Hey, Alex…"

"Bobby! I've been worried about you! I've even gotten calls from the Captain asking where you were. Logan gave him some ridiculous story about him getting you drunk, and you going home with a girl, and now you were recovering from it. Is this just Logan's cover up for something more serious?" He could see her eyebrows raised as they always would when she asked him personal questions.

"No, that's the story." He breathed in and breathed out heavily. He had landed on the couch to here his head was in the elbow of the back and the side. His left hand held the phone, his right hand on his chest. He looked down at his chest hair and began examining how many silver strands had joined the jungle. He looked down at his attire, or lack there of. He was clad in nothing but a pair of red christmas boxers, a gift from his mother a few christmases ago. Well, this would be an interesting situation while speaking to the woman whom he had had certain feelings about.

"Sounds pretty adventurous for you, Bobby. I hope you didn't take it too far." Eames's voice lightened, there were children in the background. I could see Alex rustling a kid's hair as they ran by, holding water guns and other toys.

"Well, I have been recovering for about 2 days now. I'd say I went too far, but I think I could do some more." He laughed a little bit. "Perhaps we should have a contest to see who would take more." The image of Bobby going against Alex in an alcohol consumption contest flashed in Bobby's head. She was a small woman, but she could hold her liquor.

"The night I get back, I challenge you. You're going down, big guy!" She laughed loudly. Bobby closed his eyes and listened to her. This laugh, Eames's laugh, was perfect. The laugh on the phone was disturbing and immediately made Goren angry, and mean, something that was not that easy to do.

"Alright, Eames, I'll see you in a few days. Captain's calling. Bye!" Bobby hung up with his partner, then stared at the screen of his cell phone that read "Captain Calling". Should he? Should he not? He had already taken 2 days off. What would keep him from taking more? Then, the sunflower came rushing back into his mind. That girl, that clean, that MO. This was most likely what he is calling for.

No matter what Captain was calling for, Goren's mood wouldn't drop anymore. Even though he had felt like complete and utter crap because of the issues with the caller and his temporary annoyance with Eames, talking with her had soothed it all. Her melodious voice always wiped away all of the ailments that affected him.

With this new calm mood, Goren took a deep breath, then answered the phone.

"Goren."

"Good morning, Goren. I hope you had a restful 2 days break."

"Not exactly, but thanks." He didn't want to elaborate on the details of his short vacation.

"Well, we need you back at Major Case. We've gotten more information to add to this "Sunflower" case. I suggest you go to the crime scene as soon as possible. The address is 14354 52th Street."

"Yeah, okay. I'll be there." Goren went to end the call, but then Captain's voice stopped him.

"Oh, and Goren?"

"Yeah?"

"Make sure to clean up, we don't need any traces of your vacation on the scene."

"Yeah, Captain." The two hung up.


	9. Lethally Blonde

Goren walked into the apartment. The walls were dull red with paintings of flowers scattered everywhere. A leather jacket was laying across the back of the black leather couch in the middle of the room. CSIs and police officers were walking around inspecting this and that.

"Detective Goren." A balding man stepped out of a room and motioned towards Bobby. Goren nodded, then followed the man.

"Neighbors called us when she didn't leave the place for 2 days. The landlord came to collect rent, knocked on the door, she didn't answer, so he used his key to get in and found her like this." The policeman said while walking around the bed.

"A girl lay there, just like the first victim, but this woman was shorter and had blonde hair. Her hair was strewn about her head in a golden halo. Clasped in her hands was a large sunflower.

"Name?" Goren came closer to the bed. The comforter was a grungy green that matched the dirty powder pink walls. The room was filled with photo frames and leather.

"Cindy Hughes." Bobby stopped. He bent over to take a closer look at the woman. "42, born in Florida, worked at some biker bar. Neighbors said she always left for the gym around 6 AM, then again at 1. When they didn't see her come out, that's when they go suspicious."

It was her. It was the woman from the bar. Since her face wasn't smeared with eyeliner and cherry red lipstick, Goren didn't recognize her. Now, the only makeup on her face was foundation.

Bobby reached down and gently turned her head to look for the wound found on the last victim. It was there, perfectly cleaned.

He picked up her hand from the flower. _Manicured nails…_ He lifted the hand to his nose _…and strawberry soap._ He put the hand back on the flower and gazed down at her. She was dressed in a blue sundress, which contrasted the black leather outfits strewn around the apartment.

Goren tore his eyes away from her, then walked to her bureau and began opening the drawers. In the 3rd drawer he opened he found a revolver laying in a bed of lacey lingerie. _She could have protected herself, but she didn't…_Next to the gun was a pink photo album with a little girl on the cover. Bobby used his pinky to open the book. The first page contained a photo of Cindy and a toddler with golden hair in a pink dress. Both wore wide smiles, proof of their happiness. '6/26/93 Caroline's 3rd Birthday' was scrawled underneath the picture in flowery handwriting. _She has a daughter…_

"She has a daughter. Here," Goren picked the album up and handed it to the police officer that had brought him into the room. "Find out who and where she is." The officer walked away and Goren turned his attention back to the bureau. He began ruffling through the panties and bras. In the back of the drawer, he found a wad of cash. _There's over $1000. The perp wasn't looking for something to steal…_

Goren's train of thought was interrupted by his phone ringing. He pulled it out of his jacket pocket and looked at the screen. Captain.

"Goren."

"Goren, I need you to come back to the squad room. We've brought in some witnesses for the first victim."

"Okay, Captain. I'll be right in." Goren hung up and put the phone back in his pocket. He began to make his way out of the room, but turned before he left to look around once more. She looked so peaceful laying on that bed, as if she had gone to a better place. Cases like this always upset Bobby. This woman seemed innocent, working hard with a daughter out there somewhere. The woman didn't have track lines, or any drug paraphernalia, so the money was most likely going to be used for her daughter, wherever she was.

Goren left the room and made his way to the front door. He stopped when the policeman approached him.

"I need you to find that girl in those photos…" The policeman nodded.

Goren left the apartment and made his way to 1 Police Plaza.


	10. Dinner with Gregory Peck

**Author's Note: Hello, again. I'm really starting to pump these chapters out. Let me know how they are. I love doing dream sequences. I promise she will be explained later. **

"The last time I saw her we were at a cafe talking about my wedding," Alexis Nichols sat across the table from Robert Goren in the interrogation room. The girl hadn't raised her eyes from her car keys since she walked into 1 Police Plaza. She was fingering a keychain with a picture of herself and the first "Sunflower Killer" victim on a beach. They had known each other for 6 years and Linzy Carmello was even going to be the maid of honor in Alexis's wedding.

"Did she mention any arguments she had gotten into? Any threats or phone calls?" Bobby raised his eyebrows as he watched the girl. She had brown hair with freshly died highlights, a spray on tan, and acryllic nails. The wedding was obviously soon.

The girl looked at him for the first time. Her brown tear-rimmed eyes were full of sorrow and her chin quivered. She breathed in deeply, then turned her head away from Bobby, wiping her tears away.

"I know its hard, but I need to know. The more you tell me, the closer we get to putting her murderer away." He pulled out a hankerchief from his pocket and held it out to her. She took it and sniffled, then muttered a quiet "thank you".

"She said something about some girl at a supermarket and some phone call she had gotten in the middle of the night. The person on the phone was singing Rockabye Baby...or....Ring Around the Rosie...or-"

"You Are My Sunshine..." Bobby looked down at the metallic table in contemplation. What did it all mean? Apparently the person who called Linzy was the same person that called him. Why her? Why him?

"Yeah, that's it." Alexis blew her nose before continuing. "She said it creeped her out and she couldn't sleep the rest of the night. When she asked who it was, the person laughed and hung up."

Bobby began to take notes in his portfolio that was laying to his left on the table. Everything was being tossed around in his head.

"Did she know who called? Did she recognize the voice?" Goren glanced up at Alexis, who had resumed rubbing the picture.

"No," Alexis shook her head, then her face crumpled and she burst into tears once more. Her shoulders shook and she brought her hands to her face. Bobby watched her until she finally calmed down enough to speak. "The person was whi-whi-whispering," She declared between sobs. "D-d-do you think the person that called killer her?"

"What about the supermarket?" Bobby had learned to redirect people when they asked questions like that. Answering that question would upset her even more.

"she said that a girl approached her at Whole Foods and knew her name, claiming that they went to high school together. Linzey didn't remember or recognize her. But, that's all I know." Alexis sighed in attempt to stop the sobs. She began to unfold, then re-fold Goren's hankerchief.

"Thank you. If we have any more questions we will let you know," Bobby stood, gathered his portfolio, and opened the door. Alexis got up and walked by him. She tried to give him his mascara-stained hankercheif back, but he told her to keep it.

"Goren!" Bobby looked towards the direction his name came from. It was the Captain.

Bobby made his way to the Captain's office, occasionally glancing over to Alexis, who was weaving her way towards the exit. He walked past Wheeler, who was at her desk with another detective, and nodded to her.

"So? A kid was playing a prank. I can't count how many times I've gotten calls in the middle of the night from kids trying to have a laugh!" Ross was leaning on his desk in front of Bobby, who was sitting in a chair with his portfolio open. "If the second victim got the same call, we'll know it is more than a coincidence. But until then, its just a prank." Gray hair snaked from his temples into the black curls.

"The MOs are exactly the same. They both had manicured nails, skin scrubbed with strawberry scented soap, foundation to cover the bruises. This suggests that the killer had an obsession with perfection and beauty." The door opened and a man handed a paper to the Captain.

"Both foundations were ClearSkin shades #112 and #245." the Captain raised his eyebrows, then put the paper on his desk. "You need to find all the stores in the area that sell those foundations and get some security tape."

"A friend of Linzy's said a girl approached her in Whole Foods laiming to be an old classmate, but Linzy didn't recognize her." Bobby felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He hoped it was Eames.

"Find out what Whole Foods are in her neighborhood. You know what to do." Ross got up and walked around to the chair behind his desk. "If you'll excuse me, detective, I have a lunch date with my ex-wife to talk about magazines she found under my son's mattress."

The apartment was dark except for the flickering of the TV. Bobby was sprawled out across the couch in his boxers and a t-shirt. An empty bowl that had once been filled with leftovers from an Italian restaurant along was on the end-table along with a glass of scotch with ice.

To Kill A Mockingbird was on. It wasn't Bobby's favorite movie, but there was nothing else to watch.

He had talked to Eames earlier that day after his meeting with Ross. She just wanted to make sure that he was alright and back at work. She also couldn't help bragging about her "amazing" hot stone massage, sunbathing on the pool deck, and the delicious food available to her 24 hours a day. She couldn't stop talking about the homemade pineapple shurbert and how much he'd love it.

The ice clinked in the whisky glass as he brought it up to his lips. It was 1 AM. He didn't want to go to sleep. Sleep would bring the possibility of being woken up by another phone call by that murderer.

His eyes began to droop closed. He turned the TV up so he wouldn't go to sleep, but within 30 minutes he was asleep...

_Bobby stepped out of the shower and grabbed the white towel on the hook beside the door. The mirror was covered in water droplets from the steam. He grabbed a hand towel and rubbed his hair with it then wrapped the other towel around his waist. Bobby opened the door and was met with the smell of bacon and eggs. He closed his eyes and breathed in the warm smell of his happiness._

_Goren walked to his closet and chose a white v-neck shirt and a pair of khakis. He got dressed, then walked to the windows that lined the wal to the left of the ed. A glass door was embedded into the windows which lead to the porch overlooking the pristine beach the house was perched on. _

_Bobby opened the door and stepped outside. The smell of the ocean, the warmth of the air, and the sound of the waves enveloped him. He put his hands on the railings and closed his eyes. _

_He sat there for a few minutes, his hair being combed by fingers of wind. He felt movement around his waist and the pressure of her pressed against his back. He turned his head to the side and smiled as she kissed the back of his neck. Her left arm wrapped around his waist and her right arm rubbed his stomach underneath his shirt. He turned to face her and her hands went to his chest._

_"Are you happy? Truly and utterly happy?" He put his hands on her hips as she spoke. Her angelic face was upturned to him, those blue eyes sparkling. _

_He smiled and drew her closer. "Truly and utterly..." He bent down to give her a kiss, but she pulled away before their lips met. _

_"Oh, no, mister!" She laughed, grabbing his hand and pulling him inside. "I'm starving and I won't let you distract me!" She towed him to the sparkling white kitchen where toast, eggs, bacon and a pitcher of orange juice awaited them on the table. _

_Bobby's stomach growled at the sight of all the food. he sat down at the table and watched her move about the room. She had wrapped herself in her white robe and pulled her hair into a long, loose braid that fell across her right shoulder. She grabbed two glasses, placed them at the set spots on the table and filled them from the pitcher. _

_Bobby didn't pry his eyes from her. Her ivory skin was like porcelain, her hair like crimson fire. He loved that hair so much, how it framed her face, how it encircled him when she bent over him in bed. She had luscious lips that he kissed every time he had the chance. She was tall at 5 feet 11 inches with legs that went on for miles. He was totally and madly in love with her. _

_"I'm not going anywhere, so you don't have to stare." She smiled and raised a blonde eyebrow as she sat down. Both her eyebrows and eyelashes were a shade of blonde that glittered in the sun. She grabbed a piece of toast before serving herself eggs._

_"But I want to. This seems to much like a dream." Bobby put his elbow on the table and rested his head on it. A smile tugged on the edges of his lips as he watched her sip her orange juice. She glanced at him over the edge of her upturned glass. His gaze caused her to blush, the pink delicately darkening her cheeks, which made her even more irresistible and beautiful to him. _

_"I love you," Goren said softly. Her eyes ignited with happiness and she stood and walked over to him. He leaned back in his chair to allow her to move into his lap. She took her place there, sprawling her legs on either side so the two lovers faced each other. She put her hands on either side of his face and smiled, Bobby brought his hand to her braid and pulled her hair loose, allowing it to cascade down her chest. _

_"I love you, Robert Goren." She leaned in to kiss him, but he swept her up in his arms instead. He carried her to the bedroom, all the while they never broke eye contact...._


	11. Surprises, Veal, and Good Company

**Author's Note: There's a hint in this chapter about who the mysterious girl is from the dreams. R&R!!!**

Goren's phone, which was nestled amongst the dirty dishes and trash that had accumulated on the coffee table throughout the past 3 days, began to ring. The ring spliced through the silent, warm, thick air.

Bobby rolled over and opened his eyes reluctantly to the sight of the gloomy apartment. The dawn poured through the cracks in the make shift blinds that were drawn over his apartment's windows. Ever since he had learned that someone had been watching him, he had covered all of his windows with extra sheets, including the window above his kitchen sink. The apartment now had a dreary feel that was chopped into segments by the light that snaked across the floor.

An infomercial selling vacuums was on TV now. Two bubbly women bounced up and down, praising how well the vacuum picked dirt up from the deepest levels of any type of carpet.

Bobby yawned. He was sprawled out on the couch, one arm leaning against the back of the sofa, another falling over the edge, both legs going over the armrest. This was definitely another time that he regretted buying the love seat.

Goren extended his arm to the coffee table and began groping the table top for the ringing phone. He finally found it after sticking his hand in the melted ice of the his whiskey from last night.

"Uh..Hello?" He said, his voice raspy from sleep. He wiped his other hand on his boxers to dry it.

"Goren, get in now." Ross's voice thundered through the ear piece. Before Bobby could answer him, the Captain had hung up.

Bobby slowly stood and looked around him at the messy apartment. Clothes were strewn everywhere, dishes sat unwashed in the sink, his trash can was overflowing. The sight of his surroundings made him feel helpless, like he was completely lost now. Was it because Alex was gone? Was it because of this Sunflower Killer case? Had he slipped back into the trenches of depression? All of these questions flowed throughout his head as he made his way to the shower.

* * *

"Explain to me why your fingerprints were on the sunflower from the crime scene, detective." Ross threw the manila folder containing the fingerprint analysis on his desk. Goren had come into his office a mere 5 seconds before the captain began badgering him with questions.

"Um...I don't know..." Goren's brow was furrowed. He had taken his usual spot in the chair furthest from the desk. He hadn't touched the sunflower, even while at the crime scene. How did his finger prints end up on the flower?

"You better find out soon, Goren, or else you're going to have a lot of Hell coming your way..." Ross put his hands on the back of his plush rolling chair. The bags under his eyes had grown since yesterday, a sign of another sleepless night.

"Hang on, Captain..." Bobby stood, his eyes wandering around him. He stalked out of the office and over to his desk. He pulled open the second draw of his desk. It wasn't there. He had put the sunflower, the one that had been sent to him, in his desk. The note he kept in his portfolio.

Goren looked around the squad room. People were rushing about. It had to be one of them. No one would have access to his desk.

"Detective? Am I missing something?" Ross had followed him to the desk. Bobby turned to meet the Captain's questioning gaze.

"There was...uh...someone sent me a sunflower, with...this....note." Bobby took the portfolio from under his arm and opened it. He plucked the small piece of paper from it and held it out for Ross to take. "It was on my desk a few days ago. I put it in my second drawer," Bobby gesticulated to the open drawer. "But now its gone. You can talk to Logan. He was there..." Goren brought his hand up to his forehead and attempted to rub the tension from it. His heart was beating wildly.

Ross examined the three words scrawled across the paper. He looked up at Bobby, who was now scratching the back of his neck and staring at each passerby suspiciously.

"Detective, I want to find out if there are any other fingerprints on this besides yours, mine, and Logan's." He handed the note back to Goren then turned to walk away. About 3 steps into his exit, he turned back to Bobby. "If you see Logan, let him now I want to talk to him." Ross turned and walked back to his office.

Bobby eyed the Captain as he closed the office door, sat in his chair, picked up the phone and dialed a number. The Captain talked on the phone briefly, hung up, then made eye contact with Goren, who was still watching him.

Bobby turned and plopped down in his chair. Who would be doing this? Was this person after him for some reason? He had pissed off a lot of people through out his career, so something like this would be possible. However, if the person who committed these murders and who was calling him was someone he had put away they would want to be known. They would want him to know that they were seeking vengeance. From what he could tell, this person was not someone he had arrested, but somebody new, somebody that was proving themselves for some reason.

* * *

Bobby found himself seated at his favorite Italian restaurant Ciao. He was seated at a table with a single candle flickering in the middle. His surroundings were darkened, the moving shapes around him barely visible.

"Hello, Mr. Goren," Claire smiled as she approached his table. He always requested to be seated in her section. "I'm glad to see you for the 3rd week. I'm starting to think you've come just to see me." She had deep dimples in her cheeks, giving her an innocent, cute appearance.

"Perhaps," Goren smiled at her from his seat. She was tall and voluptuous, a perfect specimen of the female gender. Her hair was pulled up in a french twist with loose strands falling down the back of her neck.

A blush danced across her candle-lit face. "Well, Mr. Goren, I have to remind you that I have a boyfriend." She put her hand on the back of the chair across from him and leaned on it. Despite the loose black long sleeve button-up shirt and dress pants he could see her irresistible curves.

"He's a lucky man." Goren found himself unable to smile. He came to this restaurant numerous times a week to see Claire and to purge all of his inner tension by way of this meaningless talk. When he left the care of Claire, he felt like a real man and somehow like he was important to someone, that someone actually liked him.

"Would you like the usual? Water with the veal parmesan?" She leaned down a little bit to look straight into his eyes. Her blue eyes reminded him of those of someone he knew along time ago. Maybe it was those eyes that drew him to her.

"Yes, please." Bobby handed her the unopened menu that had been placed in front of him.

"I'll be right out with your water." She took it then sashayed past him. He resisted turning around and watching her leave.

He waited for her to return with his water and breadsticks. She always brought him extra plus a small container of marinara sauce. The veal wasn't amazing here, but he enjoyed the company. Sometimes he would come late so that he could talk with Claire even longer. A couple of times, after the lights went up, she would even sit across from him. During these few visits, they would talk shyly about this and that, mostly about their jobs. He knew that this relationship would never extend past these restaurant walls, but he saw her as much as he could to keep himself going.

Once she was gone, which was inevitable, he didn't know how he would get the needed female interaction. He wasn't getting any from Eames (she had never been too affectionate towards him) and he certainly didn't have a girlfriend. He wished he did though, and dreaded Claire's boyfriend and the 20 year age difference between them.


	12. 3 Children and a Skirt

**Author's Note: This explains the girl in the dreams. I tried to get my ideas of what I wanted to happen across, but I think its fuzzy in some spots. Hopefully its understandable, though. More to come!**

Her name was Juli Mgyntie and she was beautiful. Bobby could still remember the exact shade of her auburn hair, the way it smelled, how a stray curl would innocently fall across the top of his desk every once in a while. He would treasure these beautiful rogue curls during English class. He would gently caress them, twirl them around his finger, so gently that she would not notice him. They were soft as silk and shone in the sunlight that spliced the air through the window.

He would close his eyes and recall those days when she wore that blue and green mini-skirt and how he would stare at her long ivory legs in Calculus. He dreamed of the time he had been perched on her bed in her bedroom while discussing an assignment in Biology with her. In these dreams, he was sitting on the edge of her queen sized bed with a green and pink quilt on top of it. There were tie-dye pillow cases, rock band posters, photos of Juli and various men, trophies for science fair projects, scarfs from Asia, teddy bears, text books, and an acoustic guitar all strewn about the room. He loved this cluttered environment, even though his own room was the antithesis of this chaos. There were colors everywhere, perfectly displaying her eclectic personality. Every time he came into this room, he always was met with records softly playing, but he could never figure out where exactly the music was coming from. The smell of the place still lingered with him, it was the scent of her.

Bobby had been in love with her ever since he first saw her in his 8th grade math class. Her curly red hair was not nearly as long as it was in high school, but she was just as beautiful. She was wearing a white button-down collared shirt beneath a brown sweater. A green skirt wrapped tightly around her curves and moccasins graced her feet. Juli sat innocently in her desk doodling on her composition book, unaware of the rumors that were already spreading throughout the class, and school, about her: she was a transfer student from Raleigh, North Carolina; her dad had lost his job there, so they were forced to move; now he worked as a body guard for a gangster; she's a vegan; She has obscene piercings; she's been pregnant once; she has a 30 year old boyfriend. All of these circulated about the subject like moths around a light bulb. But, inevitably, every moth will be sucked into the beauty of the light.

_Bobby sat next to her, so he was the first person she turned to when she needed another pencil._

_"Excuse me, um, do you have a pencil? Mine snapped in half. I guess I'm too heavy handed!" A broad smile graced her voluptuous lips, crinkling her freckle covered nose._

_Bobby turned his head nervously and stared at her, completely surprised that such a beautiful girl would talk to him. He was the nerd of the class, the kid sitting 3 seats behind him was the one who attracted the pretty girls. Bobby was invisible to girls like this._

_It took 15 seconds for him to process her request. He snapped out of his awe and reached in his pack to pull out a pencil for her. He handed her an unused pencil, the point sharpened to a perfect point. Bobby kept many pencils like that in his back pack. He couldn't stand to use dull pencils so he would constantly rotate through them every 10 minutes of writing._

_"Thank you! You're so sweet! My name is Juli, Juli Mgyntie. What's yours?" She locked her eyes onto Bobby's. He had never seen such clear blue eyes before. They were pacific ocean blue, with a deeper blue rimming the iris. Her pupils were slightly dialated, meaning she was looking at something she enjoyed in some capacity._

_"Umm, Robert Goren...." Bobby muttered as he averted his eyes to his desk top where he had been drawing a racing car. "You can call me Bobby, though." He hunched down even further into his seat causing the fabric of his sweat shirt to bunch up at the base of his neck._

_"You look like a Bobby. I like that." She leaned forward towards him to get him to look at her. She could tell he was not a social butterfly, yet something drew her to this tall, awkward boy with analytical, chocolate brown eyes. "Do you like math? I love math. This is my favorite subject. Now, English, not so much. I just can't get a grasp on prepositions and gerunds and those silly metaphors. If you are trying to say something, why not say it in the simplest of terms? There is no need to embellish your words unnecessarily."_

_Bobby's head lifted. "But without beauty in words, there is no beauty in the world. Without these decorous words, words that do not clog the meaning but deepen it, much of our culture would disappear. We would not have a lot of what we see around us. If you were to say "the man is dying.", you sound like a robot reciting what exactly you were told to say, but if you say "The archaic man met the messenger of his soon demise.", you venture even deeper into the meaning of the stories. If there is no embellishment, the reader is left without an emotional attachment, something that must exist in order for the reader to extract relevant morals, insight, or advice."_

_Juli looked stunned. She hadn't expected such passion on such a simple subject. Bobby spoke with flames in his words as if he had been waiting for this conversation._

_In this class, Bobby stayed sequestered to his desk in he middle of the room. All he needed all period would be pieces of paper and numerous sharpened pencils. No one asked him for anything and he never asked anyone for anything. They feared he would be the person to blow up the school since he was so introverted and socially awkward. So, the entire universe of the math class had now been altered. Robert Goren had ventured out of his cave and was now participating in class activities by ranting and raving about something._

_Bobby had stood while he was speaking and began to pace between his and Juli's desk. It was 15 minutes before the class started, so practically no one was in the class. He had forgotten about the few sitting in the desks around him when he had first looked in her eyes. He would never do this, though, had there been more people there._

_"So, Bobby, you've been thinking about this?" Juli stops him at her desk. She looks up at him with a glint in her eye and a smile curling her lips._

_He stopped and looked at her. He sighed then took his seat again. Goren rambled a bit more, but was ultimately calmed by the fact that there was someone who was interested in him. Usually when someone talked to him, they were either asking for help on his homework or mocking him. When he would hold a conversation with someone, their attention was diverted to something else, not on him. He could tell from Juli's kind eyes that she was intrigued by him._

_"Yes. That's what I think about, well not that specific topic, but that's what I do. I think of things that are strange to others, but fascinating to me. They tease me because they say I'm Rodain's Thinker." He resumed his hunched position in his desk, completely out of breath._

_"No, you're not the Thinker..." She paused and analyzed his face then brought a hand up to touch his cheek. This was the first time that a non-relative of Bobby had done anything like his. She was even touching him! The boy 3 seats back would kill to be in Bobby's shoes._

_Goren was completely shocked. His eyes grew wide as her fingers met his skin, but he settled when he saw her smile._

_Bobby enjoyed her touch for a few seconds, but then shied away from it. She withdrew her hand, a smile still played on her lips. Bobby brought his eyes back down to the race cars on his desk._

_"Since I'm new, I sort of need to be shown around. Do you want to do that? We can meet after school at the cafe across the street and walk around." He looked up at her as she spoke. Those red curls framed her delicately freckled face, those bright blue eyes. There was something in the way she talked that completely calmed his nerves. Her voice was like a gentle breeze rustling the leaves of a tree in summer, like fingers of light combing through the air on a Sunday morning. It was comforting._

_Bobby couldn't help but agree to it. He had never been asked to do anything like that, let alone by a girl. Granted, he had his friends, but they were always busy playing Dungeons and Dragons, something that Bobby had never gotten into._

_The class began, so all attention was directed towards the archaic teacher at the front. Juli's hair had escaped her loose braid and was now falling around her shoulders. Bobby was fascinated with it. He had never seen someone with such beautiful red hair. She was like a porcelain doll or someone from a movie, completely unreal. He spent the period staring at her, then was excited to find that she was in 3 more of his classes. In those classes, though, she sat far away from him and was constantly engaged in conversations with the 'cool' boys. Jealousy burned Bobby's chest._

_The school day inched by for Bobby, but he finally found himself at the cafe. The two shared a piece of apple pie there, then began their journey around the city. The entire time, though, Bobby was extremely nervous. He stuttered, he looked at the ground, he fidgeted with his hands. This was the first time he ever had a crush on a girl._

Despite all of Bobby's hopes to make Juli his first girlfriend, she had many men lined up to take their turn with her. She went through a different boyfriend every two weeks. Juli had once explained to Bobby that she would only keep one around to have fun, but once they began to get all sappy and tell her they loved her, she'd ditch them.

"I'm not looking for a husband, I'm looking for a good time! I'm only 15 for God's sake!" Juli had said.

She would never think of him as more than a friend. All of those boys in her pictures were artsy guys that were in bands. They all had shaggy hair, shadows of beards, torn jeans, and leather jackets. Bobby didn't have facial hair yet, his mother insisted he keep his hair cropped short, he rarely wore jeans, and he couldn't find a leather jacket to fit his large frame. All hope was lost for him. He dreamed that she would one day fall into his arms and they would ride into the sunset, but that never came true. Juli had kept him her closest friend and nothing more. She confided everything in him, yet refused to feel the same way for him as he did for her.

When Bobby had left for the military, she had made him promise to write her letters at least once a week. She had sent him hundreds of postcards from her journey across Europe with a group of her friends, however she rarely received a letter from him. He had grown even more in love with her as he read her messages, and he feared that writing something to her would make his feelings for her obvious and would sever the tie between them. The postcards eventually stopped and the two were separated for what Bobby thought would be forever.

* * *

Bobby sat back in his chair. He pulled his hands back behind his head and stared at the computer screen, the only light in the apartment. An open e-mail was on the display. Although the message only contained a few lines, those few lines had made Bobby's heart race, his skin moist and his mouth dry.

"Bobby-  I haven't talked to you in so long. I hope everything is going well and that you've found happiness.

North Carolina has nothing for me now, so I'm coming to the city to look for an apartment. I hope to see you when I come next week. Call me when you get this!

~Juli"

He had finally gotten over his desire for her, but now she had poured back into his dreams and e-mail inbox. Years after their correspondence had ended he still had feelings for her. That teenage desire had turned into adult yearning. He couldn't count how many times he had been laying in bed, on the brink of sleep, and imagined her lying next to him. For 8 years, he prayed to God that she would love him as he loved her.

Bobby sighed and rubbed his eyes with his right hand. He leaned forward and placed his elbows on each side of the keyboard. What would he do? He didn't want to be faced with the first person who he had ever loved, then have to relive the rejection. But, what if it was different now? What if she had miraculously discovered that she had had feelings for him all along?

No, this was a fantasy. It was much like the scenes he had dreamed up where the two were married and had kids. In these dreams, there were two boys and one girl. The girl looked just like Bobby's mother, yet had Juli's red curly hair. The boys had Juli's freckles, but his eyes. His imagination had conjured up many sequences where the family was at the park, buying a puppy, celebrating Christmas, even trick-or-treating.

Juli probably had all of this, loving children and an admiring husband, while Bobby was sitting in a dark apartment alone.

He had to call her. If he didn't, he'd look as though he had completely forgotten about her and didn't want to see her, which was not the case. Bobby pulled out a sticky note from a drawer and a pencil from another then began to write the number that she had put in a post script.

Bobby exited out of his e-mail before shutting down the computer. The entire room went black around him. Somewhere in the place something was beeping. _My phone's dying…_He thought. He stood and stretched his hands over his head, the cool air meeting the bare flesh that peaked out from the bottom of his button-down shirt.

He had been home from work for about 2 hours. He had spent the entire day interviewing friends and family of the victims. None of them had any new information, so by the end of his day Bobby had found himself in the exact same place as the day before.

It was around 7 o'clock now according to the digital clock perched on the top of a bookshelf in the computer room/bedroom. Goren walked out into his kitchen and turned on the light above the sink. All of his windows were still blocked out, so none of the remaining rays of sunlight were able to snake across the carpet in his living room like they usually do.

Goren's stomach ached from hunger and growled. Bobby rubbed his stomach with his hand and looked around. He had absolutely no food except for a jug of orange juice, week old Chinese take-out, and Lean Cuisine Shrimp Scampi. He didn't want to drink orange juice for dinner, the beef lo mien smelled terrible, so he had to settle on the frozen dinner.

He pulled it out of the freezer and its box then punctured the plastic film with a butter knife. After he put the meal in the microwave, then punched in 3:30, he took his dying phone in his bedroom to charge it.

He searched blindly for the plug, too lazy to turn the light on. He finally found it then flopped onto his back on the bed. He had no missed calls according to the front screen. He flipped the phone open and dialed Eames's number. He closed his eyes and listened to the phone ring. Eames had been his only true friend throughout these last couple of years, but he felt she was slipping away. He had to fight to keep her close to him.

"Hi. You've reached Alex Eames. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can! Thanks!"

"Hi…um…its me. I just want to call and check on you. I….uh…haven't heard from you all day. There's…um…something I kind of want to talk about with you. If you wouldn't mind giving me a call sometime, it'd be great. I have tomorrow off, so just…uh…call me." Bobby closed the phone before throwing it to the floor. He pulled a pillow close to him and turned on his left side. Tomorrow was Saturday, therefore a day off for him. A little bit of golden light snuck beneath the curtain to shine on his floor.

The microwave sounded, but Bobby didn't get up. He stared at that little slice of light as if it were something unattainable, something dangling in front of him but which was not tangible.

_She has to have kids and a husband. She moved back to North Carolina to settle down with her fiancee. But, she's coming back to the city, so maybe she separated from him. _

_Is she coming back because she's been thinking of me? Because she feels bad about moving back without seeing me? I wonder what she looks like. Does she have silver in her red hair like I have? Are her legs just as gorgeous? God..._

Bobby squeezed his eyes shut and breathed in deeply. His pillow smelled like his after shave from those times he showered and laid down afterwards. He had the habit of showering at night and applying the after shave even though he was going to bed.

Goren felt himself drifting off to sleep despite his being in day clothes and the smell of the now cooked meal in the microwave. He soon slipped off into his dreamland to meet her on a beach...


	13. Barefoot Visions

**Author's Note: And the plot thickens! ha ha ha. I'm having fun with this story! Sorry its taken me so long for this chapter. What usually happens is I'll be inspired by the new episodes on Sundays, then go into a writing frenzy on Mondays and the rest of the week is completely void of it until Sunday once again rolls around.**

**Please read and review!**

The wind combed through Bobby's hair as he made his way down the dock. It was a sunny day, not a cloud in the sky. Couples with small children sat in the field to his left while boats bobbed on the choppy water to his right. He could smell the hot dogs from the stand on the side of the dock and hear the homeless man a bit further down the way begging for change.

"Please, sir. I'm homeless, I have no money, no food. God is kind to those who are merciful." The old man was holding out a Starbucks cup that was missing the rim. He had a long beard, an desperate voice, and hands the shook violently. The cup rocked from side to side in his grip as if it were one of the sailboats in the river.

Bobby stopped and eyed the man. Goren had a soft spot for the homeless. Frank had been homeless, living off of the charity of others, so Bobby felt obliged to help.

Bobby made his way to the hot dog stand and purchased two: one for the vagrant and one for himself. He approached the man, handed him the hot dog and slipped a twenty dollar bill into the cup. The man shouted his gratitude after Bobby as he walked away from the dock and the cheery waters and onto the soft grass.

The detective began weaving through the happy families. He had found himself once more face to face with a happiness he never had and will never have. Parents called after their children who had curls framing their cherubic faces. Their visages were lit up with joy and the warm sunshine.

What would have happened if his father hadn't left? Would Bobby's childhood have been a happy one? Would his mother not have ended up mentally imbalanced? Would Frank have turned out better? Maybe a good childhood would have taken Bobby down a better path, one that led to a wife, children, a back yard, a picket fence, a golden retriever named Sam. Perhaps he would have come home every night to "Daddy, Daddy!" and "How was your day, sweetie?" instead of the silence he now met when he entered his dark apartment. There might have even been family dinners where Frank came over to Bobby's suburban home with his own wife and children and they all would have sat around the table, Bobby's dad sitting at the head of the table carving the turkey and Bobby's mother at the other end smiling down upon all of them as grandmothers always do.

Goren felt a pang of emptiness in his gut. He didn't have this. He didn't have anything. The only women in his life were Alex, who never thought of him as more than a friend, and a few acquaintances who were all decades younger than him.

His thoughts wandered to Juli. What would it have been like if he had had the balls to ask her out on a date in high school? What if they had become girlfriend and boyfriend? Would they be married now? Sure, Bobby had had fantasies of marrying Alex, but those never made him feel as satisfied as when he imagined himself wed to Juli.

"Watch out!" Bobby turned just in time to duck as a frisbee came whizzing past his head. A girl of about 30 ran towards him, a Great Dane at her heels. The yellow frisbee had grazed Goren's shoulder and had landed about 3 feet to his right. He bent down and plucked it out of the blades of grass.

"Sorry! I'm terrible at throwing these!" She said as she patted her dog, who's head came up to her waist. Bobby handed her the disk with a smile on his face.

"Oh, no. Don't worry about it. I never got the hang of it either." He bent down and whistled for the dog to come near him.

"Go on, Mudge!" The woman said, gently nudging the canine towards Goren. The dog bowed its head and sniffed in Bobby's direction, then slowly made its way to him.

"Good boy!" The detective reached his hand under the dog's chin and lifted its head up so he could look at it. The dog had piercing blue eyes which stood out beautifully against it's fawn coat. "Wow, you've got a gorgeous dog!" He exclaimed as he rubbed behind the dog's ears briefly before standing and shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Thanks. He's my baby, my two year old 160 lb. baby!" The girl pushed her straight blonde hair behind her right ear and gazed down at Mudge. Awkward smiles passed between the two right before the dog caught sight of something, began barking, and galloped off.

"Thanks again!" The girl shouted as she ran off after Mudge. Bobby watched her run, then turned back around and began across the grass once more.

The hot dog had been consumed during his thoughts before the encounter with the frisbee and he immediately regretted buying it. The "Sunshine Killer" case had been causing his stomach to hurt due to the anxiety. He was probably developing an ulcer. Who was this person? He had contemplated the meaning of it all ever since he first discovered the caller and the killings were related.

Bobby's phone began vibrating against his fingertips in his pocket. He eagerly brought it out and looked at the display screen. It flashed 'Eames'. He sighed, then flipped the phone open.

"Goren."

"Hey, Bobby. How are you?" Her voice sounded cheerful.

"Uh...okay...you?" Goren found himself under a tree and leaned himself against the ancient trunk.

"Yeah, I'm fine...Are you sure you're okay? You sound...um...tired." Concern laced her words. He could see her eyebrows furrowed, her lips lightly pursed, her hand on her hip.

"Um...yeah. I'm good. I am a bit tired. Its been a long week. Ross has been piling up the paperwork. Its definitely a two person job..." Bobby looked around him. Clouds were beginning to gather in the east and the wind had picked up. A storm was coming.

"Ha ha. I guess that's why they assign partners." An awkward laugh sounded from both.

"Um, anyway. I just got your message. Sorry that I didn't call you earlier-"

"No, don't apologize. Its fine. It's the end of your cruise and I knew you'd be having stuff to do..." His free hand remained in his pocket. He looked down and began to dig the tip of his tennis shoe into the dirt at the base of the tree.

"Well, I'm coming in tomorrow, and I was wondering if you'd pick me up from the airport. I'll be in around...hang on...let me check my ticket...um..." Bobby could hear rustling in the background. "around noon. I'll meet you at Baggage Claim then?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'll meet you there. Um..." Goren closed his eyes and pulled his hand out of his pocket then brought it up to his forehead to rub it. "Do you want to grab lunch?" He felt his heart rate speed up and his face flush.

"Sure. Sounds good. Well, I need to go, we're about to get off of the ship. I guess I'll see you tomorrow at 12!" Someone was speaking to her and Bobby heard her say something to that person.

"All right. I'll see you then." And they hung up. Bobby looked around once more. The clouds were moving in fast. He needed to go.

He set off towards the streets and away from the tranquility of the park and the river. Car horns blared and people shouted as he stepped onto the sidewalk.

People past by in a blur and Bobby felt his mind wander off again. He immediately pictured Juli how he last remembered her: her long curly red hair loose about her shoulders, a cute green tank top and jean skirt. She wasn't wearing shoes, she rarely did. That was the day she had come to say goodbye to him before he left. They had sat for 2 hours on his front porch swing just talking, well, her mostly talking and him listening. She had grabbed his hand and begun to draw on the inside of his wrist. She decorated his pale skin with swirls and symbols and the head of Ganesh, the HIndu God of good fortune (she was obsessed with Hinduism).

"Don't you dare forget me, Robert Goren." Her blue eyes had met his and he felt himself melt. He never would forget her.

"And don't forget me." He remembered whispering after she left, her hips swinging seductively as she walked down the sidewalk and out of his life. He fingered the slip of paper with her address on it constantly throughout the next 3 months and eventually had to tape it into a photo album before it disintegrated.

Goren didn't want to go back to his dreary apartment. He couldn't stand it there anymore. He had nothing to do in that horrid place besides sleep, and he could easily do that in a hotel. But, no matter where he was, being alone brought deep depression.

Bobby stopped on a corner and looked around him. People buzzed past along with the blobs of yellow speeding by. A small cafe with wrought iron fencing was across the street. The detective looked around, then settled on going into the cafe for a coffee.

Goren sat down at a table by the fence so that he could people watch. One of the the skills he had that always came in handy at MCS was his ability to analyze people by just looking at them. A woman walked by in a tight burgundy dress holding a black bag with the edge of a diaper peeping out of the top and black sunglasses on. She was trying to be an incognito mother, a woman looks too good to have ever given birth. She had a good figure, but she had an air of maternity and as she sauntered by Bobby could smell a light scent of baby powder. A young man of about 23 passed. He had blonde, short, gelled, spiky hair, a pinstripe suit that was too large for his slender frame, and shiny shoes that looked to be 2 sizes too big. He carried a black briefcase that looked to be about empty. He was a scared boy fresh out of college who was trying to impress daddy with his internship at some hotshot law firm. The clothes and shoes were obviously not bought by him because they didn't fit, so it could be inferred that his father had a false pride in his son and tried to convince the boy of it by buying him "big boy" clothes.

Bobby chuckled at this boy and looked down at the napkin he was folding in his lap. Without noticing it, he had begun to fold it into smaller and smaller squares. He looked up once more into the sunny streets.

As he did so, something caught his eye. He saw a flash of something. There it was again. It had appeared between the bodies of the passersby. A vision perhaps, but.... no. It was right there among the moving bodies making their way along the crosswalk heading away from the cafe. Then, it was gone. Goren stood up and searched the crowd desperately for the sight once more.... there she was crossing the street. But, it couldn't be her. She was supposed to come next week...

A bus crossed the road and she was gone. Bobby's eyes strained to look for her, but she wasn't there.

"I'm getting paranoid..." Goren said as he sat back down. "I'm going crazy..."

The waitress approached a few seconds later and as he gave her his order for a latte, his cellphone began vibrating.

"Excuse me," He said as he opened his phone.

"Goren." His voice cracked slightly as he spoke. His mouth was dry and his heart was beating fast.

"It's Ross. I need you to come now. We have more info on that sunflower case and possibly a new victim." The Captain hung up the phone as soon as he said the last word.

Goren closed the phone then looked back at the waiting girl.

"Um..cancel that. I'm sorry. I have to go. But....here..." He leaned over to one side and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. He pulled out a twenty dollar bill and held it out for the girl. She took it and a smile lit up her face. He could tell she rarely saw tips this big.

"Thank you, sir." She called after him as he made his way out of the little courtyard. He turned to his left and began to walk down the street towards One Police Plaza and coincidentally in the direction his vision had gone...


End file.
